Have you ever wondered how will it be? will you ever be able to do it? When will you do it? Would you even do it? Will you be allowed? and the list goes on and on and on…
Here I am, writing this blog, enjoying my very own company on a rented laptop, free Wi-Fi and with some empty pockets, but I wouldn’t change it for the world!
How it started
A few months ago, I had a few disrupts with my elder sibling & parents, and my mother once suggested I should live in a PG or get an apartment of my own so I could take care of myself without getting bothered about our toxic family, and after 8 months of struggling here and there I finally decided to move out on my own.
My mother chose to stay with my family with her consent so I moved away and chose myself for once.
Why is it important?
You know you’re in the deep web of toxicity, but you can’t get yourself out because, as a family, you’re supposed to love them and take care of each other, leaving them and focusing on yourself feels selfish.
Just because they’re related to you doesn’t automatically make them a positive part of your life. You know you need to do it, when you can’t focus on anything you do. be it your work or your grocery shopping even. Stop feeling guilty for your happiness
Is your sibling really a normal sibling or toxic? read more here
How to do it
It is important, and it is okay for you to focus on yourself once in a while and do things for yourself. Being kind to yourself is a long process that not everyone can take but hang in there, start taking baby steps.
But how do you even know you’re stuck in a situation when there’s no one to tell you about it?
Ask a few questions to yourself:
-When was the last time you took yourself for a health checkup?
-When was the last time you bought something randomly in a market just for yourself?
-When was the last time you invited your friends over without having to worry about your family?
-When was the last time you actually cried out loud in front of someone?
-When was the last time you shared something about YOUR personal life with any one of them?
-When was the last time you felt happy without being sad about it?
Getting stuck in a place won’t take you anywhere, try changing. You never know whom you’ll encourage in the process!
Things to keep in mind
- Moving out isn’t easy, especially when it is your first time.
Move with a flat mate or try Co-living so you won’t feel all alone, all of a sudden.
- Make sure you’re in safe surroundings.
You’re in a rush & you can’t take them anymore? Try keeping yourself calm, you already have been through a lot. Rushing things and ending up somewhere unsafe won’t help. Don’t over trust people, keep yourself on the lookout.
- Buy the necessities only
You’re out there on your own and the rent/food is already too much on your pockets. Try buying only basics first and try living alone for a while, you never know if you’re going to like it or not, Don’t rush.
- Keep your happy things around you
Surrounding yourself with your happy memories won’t do any harm.
- Keep yourself in touch
You have moved out and you’re free to take over the world but don’t forget to check up on your family. Even though they’re toxic but maybe they’re born this way? Make some time for them as well, or you can also try to take them out of the negative atmosphere after you’re mentally & physically stable to take care of them.
- Love & Believe in yourself
Moving out & living on your own terms can be a blessing as well as torture at the start, but how will you know if you won’t even try it?
Tell me about your moving out story in the comment sections, would love to add your tips & experience in the blog
